Trust

As Anthony’s spent cock slipped from the heated fist of Shelley’s ass, he collapsed atop the courtesan’s hard body, feeling the sticky wetness of the other man’s semen glue their torsos together. Shelley’s hard thighs slipped from around Anthony’s hips to land with a muted thud on the mattress. Nuzzling Shelley’s throat, Anthony breathed in the scent of the man. Cloves, citrus, and a spicy myrrh sort of scent rose from Shelley’s skin. He always smelled exotic to Anthony, exotic and decadent. It went well with his sometimes aloof demeanor. When those gray eyes went vague, Anthony always had the urge to call Shelley back to him. And he always itched to know where his lover’s thoughts had gone.

A sigh of contentment escaped Shelley now and Anthony caressed him in the aftermath of their orgasms, their first and second respectively. Touching Shelley gave him pleasure. He didn’t even have to kiss him or suck him or penetrate him to find pleasure in being with him. He’d found that ten minutes of sharing a pot of tea with Shelley could brighten his entire day. That and the shaving scene earlier brought Anthony’s thoughts around to the person who had rent the fabric of his carefully constructed adult life.

Jack Starrington.

Why the hell couldn’t the man have just stayed away another ten years? Why did he have to come around shoving Anthony’s past – their shared history – into his face and reminding him of the biggest folly of his life?

Anthony rubbed himself against Shelley, the sensation of skin on skin underscored with hard as stone male muscle bumping up against the same helped ease the discomfort of his thoughts. Shelley’s arms came up around him and contentment washed over Anthony.

“I’m not too heavy?” he asked softly and Shelley murmured a sleepy dissent, his long arms tightening around Anthony.

Closing his eyes, his nostrils filled with the scent of sex, semen and Shelley, Anthony let his body delight in the feel of the only man he’d been with in a twelvemonth. Since Jack, Anthony had been with any number of men. Probably not as many as Jack, but Anthony was choosy and suffered from a broken heart for years, neither condition being conducive to a life of carefree and short term liaisons. When he’d met Shelley, his life of sporadic celibacy ended.

No matter what happened in his life these days, he could never resist Shelley. Several years back they had begun their liaison as most relationships of that sort began. Attraction. Negotiation. Regular meetings. The exchange of money and the occasional gift. From Anthony to Shelley, never the reverse. However, a couple of years into their association, Anthony realized how very much he actually liked Shelley and their relationship had begun to subtly change until they reached their current status. After five years, Anthony had become very comfortable with Shelley. He thought of him as a friend even though he did still leave the man a bank draft when he left Shelley’s bed.

He frowned, brushing his mouth over the hard ridge of Shelley’s collarbone. Over the past couple of years, the thought of paying Shelley had begun to leave an uneasy sensation in his belly. Yet, he had no idea how to broach the subject when they both went to such pains to maintain the façade of employer and employee. At least, Anthony thought it was a façade. Or maybe a habit would be a better term. They’d fallen into a habit of behavior with each other and until tonight, nothing had changed.

However, after his encounter with Jack this night, Anthony realized just how much of a sham these rituals with Shelley were. The truth of the matter was that he’d spoken from the heart when he’d said he trusted Shelley with his life. No one shaved Anthony Banning. Not any servant or valet. When he’d been at university, a friend of his father’s had had his throat slit by a lover who’d been performing those very ablutions Shelley had just completed for him. Anthony had never let anyone near him with a razor again. Until now.

Still, Shelley kept his counsel about most things and Anthony often felt off kilter around him, especially when emotion assailed him. That he had feelings for Shelley was something he now recognized. What those feelings were exactly, Anthony couldn’t say. In his heart, he thought of Shelley as a friend and lover and he trusted the man implicitly, more than he trusted anyone else.

Cautiously, he turned onto his side on the bed, his arm coming up around Shelley’s lean waist. The contact had his cock on the rise once more, a miracle after all it had been through that night, but he ignored it. There were more important things in life than being a slave to one’s prick although, around Shelley, Anthony could often think of little else than that wayward organ.

“There nothing about you, Shelley Jefferson, that fits the word ‘merely,’” he said gruffly, referring to their earlier conversation before Shelley had enticed him to bed with a wriggle of his taut naked arse. “I fully understand the honor you have accorded me over the years. I know that no one else has been allowed to be your patron as long as I have been.”

Shelley feigned sleep but Anthony could feel the uneven thud of the other man’s heart against his chest. Behind the ornate screen, Fig played the second movement of Mozart’s Violin Concerto No. 3. Many people preferred technology and used a gramophone to play music, but Shelley’s old-fashioned idiosyncrasies were one of the things Anthony liked best about the man. And he enjoyed Fig’s playing, preferring it to the scratchy sounding gramophone. The strains of the violin soothed Anthony’s turmoil as did the caress of Shelley’s hand down his spine. He held back a shudder of pleasure, pulling his wits about him. He needed to ask Shelley to do something dangerous. Something he didn’t wish to ask his lover, but Life being the twisted circumstance that it was, he had no choice.

“Seeing Jack tonight made me realize a number of things, Shel,” he began. “I came to the realization that the reason I’ve stayed so angry and fixated on Jack is because he left with no real explanation. He didn’t trust me enough to tell me that he loved me, but he needed to take the job, that he needed more than me to be happy. He broke the bond of trust we’d had as lovers and friends.”

Anthony licked Shelley’s throat as his lover arched his neck, giving him full access to his body. “I do not give my trust, my loyalty or my friendship easily,” he whispered against Shelley’s skin and felt the man stiffen for a moment before melting against him. He wondered what thoughts had gone through Shelley’s head, what secrets the courtesan withheld from him. The notion that Shelley had secrets tightened Anthony’s gut in an unpleasant manner even though he knew it shouldn’t. He had no claim on Shelley beyond what the bank draft purchased and what Shelley allowed. His gut twisted harder.

“Seeing Jack tonight set me free, Shel,” he admitted. “Jack loves your brother, but he is also deep into something he has not revealed to me. He’s still my friend and he will always be my first lover. I can’t change those things. But he no longer holds a part of my heart. I’m free and Jack belongs to Nash. The only thing wrong is that Nash is missing and Jack wants my help to find him, the bloody bastard. It’s not in my nature to turn my back on friends, much as I might wish to now.”

“Admirable of you, my lord,” Shelley murmured, his voice husky with lust and the edge of slumber.

“Yes, it is admirable of me considering how Jack treated me. But I was young and wide-eyed then. I’m more jaded now,” he teased, pressing a kiss to Shelley’s raspberry lips. “What lies between Jack and I is history and a leap of faith. It must have galled him to have to ask for my help. And I’ve decided to give it to him in part because in the giving, I shall find some small recompense for the pain he caused me. And you, my darling Shel, are my revenge.”

Shelley went very still and his brows rose. It dawned on Anthony that his lover had been uncharacteristically quiet after their fucking. Maybe Shelley felt their association changing just as much as Anthony felt it. Of course, it could also be sleep or ennui. Anthony never stood on very sure footing when it came to Shelley’s emotions and thoughts. Sometimes he thought that when it came to emotion, Shelley had far more experience than he had although, of the two of them, he was the elder.

Anthony trailed light kisses along Shelley’s jaw. “My sister is giving a ball tomorrow night. Jack wishes to meet her husband, the Imperial Sky Admiral. I wish to have you appear at the ball in the guise of your brother. If the world thinks they see Nash Sutherland, whoever actually has Nash will be shocked at your appearance. It should not take much to make you look exactly like him and I’m sure such a subterfuge is not beyond your capabilities.”

When Shelley opened his mouth to speak, Anthony pressed a hard kiss to his lips, cutting him off. “Before you repeat that your brother is a bloody hero who is nothing like you, let me remind you we are not speaking of anything other than physical appearance. If we were to contemplate anything else, I would have to remind you that the man is a sky pirate and wanted by more governments than this one. His disappearance may mean nothing more than the fact that some bounty hunter has managed to collect his reward.”

Drawing a deep breath, Anthony revealed the part he disliked most about his plan. “But then again, Nash’s disappearance could mean something far more sinister, which means that your appearance will stir a hornet’s nest amongst those who arranged his disappearance. And that my darling, Shel, could put you in danger.”

Finally, Shelley moved. He wrapped himself sinuously around Anthony and purred in his ear, “I can take care of myself, Anthony. It’s not as if I’ve never faced danger. I am no delicate flower, much as I adore it when you treat me so. Of course, I will do whatever you wish, my lord. Impersonating my brother requires only some hair dye and a way in and out of your sister’s house. Neither of which are difficult to obtain.”

Shelley smiled languorously and Anthony felt his body respond. “Besides, Nash is my brother and the few times we were together we got along rather well to our father’s astonishment. I should hate to have him turn up…dead.” A delicate shudder went through him. “At least, not if I can prevent it.”

Slipping his hands around Shelley’s taut buttocks, Anthony’s lips nuzzled one soft earlobe. “Then we’ll cancel the piercing and I shall find a more suitable gift for you.”

Shelley chuckled, the sound completely without artifice. “Do not dare. That earring is mine.”

“You like it, then?”

“I love it.”

Anthony smiled with pleasure, his heart feeling suddenly light. “It’s like you, you know. That’s why I chose it,” he murmured, his fingertips tracing the classic line of Shelley’s cheekbone. “I saw it and instantly thought of you. Exotic, beautiful and priceless beyond compare.”

Shelley sucked in a breath, his gaze slightly stunned. Anthony’s grin widened, pleased to have caught his lover off guard. “Now, come and love me, Shel. Fuck me and make my body sing only for you.” He slipped a hand between them and rubbed Shelley’s cock. “As I shall make yours sing for me.”

Hands swept over heated skin as their mouths met in a fierce kiss. Anthony closed his eyes on a wave of pleasure so great he could have sobbed. He held Shelley tighter, reveling in the sensations that came from his lover’s touch. He thought of the razor at his throat, Shelley’s hands competently shaving him just as competently as he touched him now.

Fuck Jack, he thought. This is my truth now, even if I’m not sure what exactly it means.

Later, as dawn crept across the sky, Anthony set the small velvet sack of sovereigns on the silk covered pillow beside Shelley’s pale head. The coins were naught but a gesture, one of the many little rituals they observed in their relationship. Also inside the bag was a hefty bank draft. Sometimes, Anthony settled his unease about paying Shelley by telling himself that the money kept Shelley safe. He had only a vague notion of Shelley’s personal worth, but he’d gotten the distinct impression that his lover’s American railroad heiress mother was worth more than his Italian count father. Still, his parents’ personal wealth was their own and without any assurances that Shelley was well-heeled, Anthony could at least feel that he was caring for his lover by leaving the money.

Anthony let his gaze roam Shelley’s face, relaxed and beautiful in satiated slumber. The urge to lean down and kiss his lover goodbye assaulted him but, confused by the overabundance of emotion he’d experienced that night, he turned away from the bed without touching Shelley.

At the door, he looked back over his shoulder, his gaze caressing the muscular chest and arms of his lover. His tired, sore cock responded weakly at the sight of the beautiful man. Resolutely, he turned back to the door but stopped when his gaze caught on the sight of Fig curled into a nest of blankets behind the screen, his mouth sticky with blood orange juice. Anthony stepped closer and bent to pull a duvet over the boy. Shelley loved the child so it wouldn’t do if he caught a chill. With a little smile, he slipped from the room, closing the door softly.

Downstairs, at the main entrance of the club, Beare appeared, silent and impeccably dressed for the late hour. He held the door for Anthony, something he rarely did, since the club employed men specifically for that job.

“Send Mr. Jefferson breakfast at ten, Beare,” he murmured. “Put it on my bill.”

The steward inclined his head regally. “As you wish, your lordship.”

The notion that he could ask Beare who Shelley’s other clients were struck Anthony like a lightning bolt. Pain exploded in his chest and his breath caught in his throat. Then he realized that Beare wasn’t likely to tell him and that he had no business asking. Where his thought had come from, he’d no idea, but now it lodged in his throat like a stuck chicken bone. Jealousy licked at him. Fucking Jack. His arrival had turned Anthony’s emotions on end. Now, he was filled with a thousand impossible notions.

Beare cleared his throat. “Dr. Spencer asked after you late in the evening. However, you’d retired.”

Anthony froze. Peregrine had been looking for him? Spence had been looking for him? Lust flickered inside him. A different sort of lust than what he shared with Shelley.

“Did he say why?” he asked, his gaze raking Beare’s impassive face.

“No, your lordship. Only that he would seek you out another time.”

Stepping through the door, Anthony headed to his motorcar. His driver held the door and Anthony stepped in, settling himself against the leather seat. All the way home, he sat with his head whirling. Jack Starrington. Shelley Jefferson. And Peregrine Spencer…Dr. Spencer. Young, lithe, winsome and just starting to discover the pleasures to be had between men. Anthony’s mouth watered. Life might have handed him a bitter pill in Jack, but it had also handed him the delectable morsel known as Shelley and the innocent tidbit that was Dr. Spencer. It was up to Anthony how he managed to deal with them all. Luckily, he had ideas. Quite a lot of them.

Lex Valentine Anthony Banning, Calfiglio, Savage Beare, Shelley Jefferson